A Clean Bill of Health - Healing Lupus

 

 

I always think this is an interesting phrase.  "A clean bill of health."  What constitutes this?  I was thinking about this today as I went to a Rheumatology appointment.  I have not been to the Rheumatologist for about 4 years but had some strange symptoms in the summer that I thought should be checked out.  Of course when the appointment actually gets here the symptoms have healed themselves.

My doctor is lovely and asks how I healed the symptoms and I told him that a homeopathic remedy shifted it.  He did not really understand how homeopathy works, so he spoke into his little microphone that I took some herbs and things resolved themselves.  He then looked at my blood work and tells me: "Well, you are in the same state as you were 4 years ago, your blood work shows that you still have Lupus and that the antibodies are at the same levels."

This fascinated me!  4 years ago, I could not walk up or down the stairs, put my socks on or write. 4 years ago, I had to get a cortisone shot to help me move and live.  4 years ago, I felt sick.  Very, very sick.  And now, I feel well! Yet, my blood work showed the exact same status.  There has been an incredible shift in my being since then.  So this, to me, was very interesting.

So, who do we trust?  Do we trust the doctor that is telling us we are still "sick"?  Or do we trust our own divine wisdom that is telling us that we are healing each and every day and moving towards optimal health?  Do we wait for that "clean bill of health" from our doctor?  Or do we go inwards and trust our own healing path, tuning into what is truly happening for our body and spirit?  These are the questions I pondered today.

I have had a really tough time trying to balance out my journey with the medical system and following the way that my heart and soul knows is best for me, natural medicine, medicines from the earth that nurture, restore and heal.

For me, the struggle has been in the times, I have gone down the road of waiting too long and ending up in the hospital.  It has only been a handful of times and truly, it is my own stubborn self getting in the way of asking for help.  But it has happened.  And then I end up followed up by the allopathic system and it never fails, I always somehow end up worse off than when I started.  I am not bashing the medical system.  It has a divine place for many.  It has helped me in times of crisis.  Yet, the majority of the time, when I have been able to follow a natural route, I have felt lighter and rooted that deep knowing within me that I am restoring my health, one day at a time. 

The balance is tough.  When you are followed by the medical system, you are often inundated with fear and at times, hopelessness.  With natural healing methods, I have been gifted with empowerment and trust.   So, what does one with a chronic illness who wants to heal naturally do?  In all honesty, I have tried to stay far, far away from doctors.   I empower myself with Healing Treatments, Osteopathy, Naturopathy, Homeopathy and much more to keep myself in balance.  And I have healed enormously from doing this.  I have spent a lot of money as I do not have any coverage for these treatments and every single penny has been worth it.

And I was reminded of this today.  I could choose to go down this path where the medical system keeps trying to find something wrong with me, or I could politely say 'No, thank you' and walk towards this path of deep wisdom and trust.

Years ago a dear friend of mine had a dream about me that I leaped off a building and died.  Then I was in a cocoon and emerged the sacred butterfly.  This week I was given a message about being the butterfly - that I have truly transformed, my cells are light and it is safe to be in my body.  Butterfly Medicine has followed me deeply on this path. So today, with deep gratitude, I close my eyes and listen to my heart that beats effortlessly in my chest.  I feel the flexibility of my joints that allow me to walk and move, I look down at my hands that are once again able to type with ease.  And I feel healed.  There is no blood test in the world that can tell me all of this.  Just my own powerful knowing.  A. xo

Rainbow Healing Medicine

A few years ago, I was given the spirit name: Nenaandawi Waagikaagan Kwe, Healing Rainbow Woman.  It was a beautiful ceremony, with my grandparents and family, on my home territory,

(Neyaashinigming), complete with a beautiful hawk witnessing the ceremony.

My grandfather called the name down from the ancestors.  It felt like a dream.  I did not feel worthy of that name.

But I was.  As everyone is.  Worthy of stepping into the truest nature of all that they are.  Worthy of their soul signature.  A reflection of their beauty and light.

But it took me a while to get comfortable with it.  Traditionally, we never boasted, we were humble, we never called ourselves Medicine Woman, Shaman, Elder...anything of the sort.  And there are many that still follow these practices and beliefs.  And I honour them deeply.  I hear their words and try to follow their values and traditions, for they are my deepest teachers.

And I have gotten many judgements along the way.  "You are too young!"  "You are not wise enough to know this healing work!" "What sort of medicine do you practice anyways?  What is this homeopathy?  It is not traditional medicine."  And these comments have sunk in, because that is what they tend to do.  So, I hid a bit.  I hid my Rainbow Light because I felt that perhaps I wasn't old enough, wise enough, experienced enough.  That I could not possibly share my wisdom to its fullest extent because I have not lived a full life of an elder. 

And then one day I realized that if I didn't step into the fullness of my soul's expression, that I would get sicker.  I would never heal myself.  And that was too large of a sacrifice to make.  So I stepped out into my name, Healing Rainbow Woman. 

To me a Rainbow isn't complete without the water droplets that reflects the light.  Water is cleansing, purifying, magical, mystical.  It makes me think of tears that run down our faces as we sob, clearing out our deepest wounds or that feeling when our hearts are so full that tears pour out of our eyes, celebrating our most magnificent joy.  Water and light creating colour and beauty.  Reflection and Refraction.  The beauty of a Rainbow.  And this is my name.  And I am claiming it.

My new website is in the works and will fully reflect the full dimension of all of who I am.  All of the colours, all of the facets, all of the light.  I am ready. 

In full celebration my name, I have been creating ceremonies with the energy of the rainbow and all that it reflects to me.  My new classes will reflect this energy and I welcome you to join me if your heart calls you for I truly believe that it is time for us all to step into our fullness of who we are.  Please join us if your heart calls you.  A. xo

Here is the link for the classes on Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/events/255079241356056/

Healing Lupus...with Compassion

 

 

When I was first stepped onto this healing journey in my early 20's, one of the first books I encountered was Louise Hay's, "You Can Heal Your Life." The first page I turned to was her thoughts on the emotional causes of Lupus.  And it said: "A giving up. Better to die than stand up for one's self. Anger and punishment."

Whew.  It was intense.  And in all honesty, at the time, did not really resonate fully.

And then I lived life a little more and saw my tendency to give up my power when someone was more domineering than I was, or not speak up when my whole heart was calling me to. For me, it seemed easier to submit, to be quiet, to not create any conflict or rock the boat.  And so, I sacrificed myself.  Over and over again, I sacrificed myself.  The truth of who I was.  The gut feelings that I had.  The pains in my heart that told me to say no.  I only listened when convenient. 

I sacrificed myself.

I remember turning my attention back to that book and read the healing affirmation that went with healing Lupus.

"I speak up for myself freely and easily. I claim my own power. I love and approve of myself. I am free and safe." 

That felt light.  It felt freeing.  It felt good.  So I said it, every day.  I said it in the morning when I first woke up and at night before bed.  I repeated it over and over and over again.

And nothing changed. 

I tried to be positive.  I tried to immerse myself in all things "good" trying to banish any negative thoughts that I might have.  But it didn't work.  And I would get so frustrated at all of the people who would say: "You created this you know!  If you just didn't have those negative thoughts in the first place, this never would have happened."  The New Age community is filled with these messages.  Change your thoughts and your life is instantly transformed!  If this was true, how come my thoughts alone weren't healing my illness?

Every time I would have a flare up, I would get paranoid at what I was thinking.  I would blame myself, feeling like somehow, I have created this and no matter how much healing I do, how many supplements I take, how much I rest and eat perfectly, I am still sick!  How is this possible!  I was trying to stand up for myself, I was trying to speak my truth, I was trying to walk my talk.  And I was still sick.

I finally discovered that no matter how many affirmations I said, no matter how many greens I ate, no matter how positively I thought, it did not make any difference if I did not have a deep compassion for all of the suffering I had gone through.  To truly feel it *all*.  And that having this deep compassion for all of the perceived negative things, allowed me to truly love myself deeper.

Instead of fighting it with "a positive thought" or dismissing it to be more "spiritual", I needed to fully and completely acknowledge that my body has been in some serious pain and I could not just wish that all away or move "forward" with positive thinking. I needed to acknowledge the suffering and be with it. In all of its ugliness and darkness.  Quite frankly, I needed to feel that being sick sucks and wrap all of that suffering and truth in compassion and love.

For me, self-love comes from this compassion.  It does not come from telling myself that I love myself, or denying when I have felt dark, ugly or sad.  It comes from the deep feeling and acknowledgment of how things are in each moment.  It is not just words, it is not just affirmations.  It is the sacred vibration of compassion that rings true to every cell and fibre of my being.  This is what I am dreaming into being for myself each and every day.   The suffering, the pain, the ugly, the light, the rainbow, the magic.  I have compassion for it all. 

And when I think of those beautiful affirmations that Louise Hay suggested, I think that after all of these years, perhaps now I can say those affirmations with a deeper sense of truth. Some days, it will feel more real than others, and that is okay, for I am still learning.

I have compassion for all of the times I did not stand up for myself and bowed down.  I have compassion for all of the times that I said "yes" when I really meant "no".  I have compassion for the times my gut told me one thing and I ignored it and my heart ached. I have compassion for my physical body who has suffered lifetimes of pain.  And I have a deep compassion for every single person who has suffered in some way and who is wanting to heal.  I have been there.  I am there.  I see you.  I am you.  And we can heal together.

A. xo

This fall, I am offering some very special healing classes to those wanting to do some deep healing work.  These classes are for those who are dealing with something of a more chronic nature.  Something that you are continuously working through whether physical, emotional or spiritual, that needs a deeper sense of love and compassion to heal it.  Each class will be comprised of hands on healing, sharing, meditation, ceremony, intuitive messaging and developing of your own medicines and healing abilities to carry the healing into your daily life.  Class size will be limited to 6 participants.  Class information is found here: https://www.facebook.com/events/1456861104597864/ Contact me if you are interested in this divine healing opportunity to heal your life at asha@my-homeopath.com




 

Healing Lupus - My Journey

Juicing, Smoothies, Cleanses, Raw Food, Blood Type Diet, Gluten/Wheat/Dairy Free...

Naturopaths, Homeopaths, Osteopaths, Chiropractors, Acupuncturists, Reflexologists...

Spiritual Healers, Shamans, Psychics, Reiki Masters, Chakra Healing, Energy Therapy, Yoga...

Yes, I have done all of this and much more to try and heal my body.  You name it, I've tried it.

Am I cured?  No.  Am I healed?  I would like to think that I am slowly getting there.  After almost 20 years of trying all of these different diets, therapies and practitioners, there is clarity around what has worked for me to heal my life and my body.

Lately, I have felt inspired to share these things in hopes of inspiring others who are struggling with autoimmune conditions.  I truly believe that we are all on our own individual journeys and I truly believe that all healing is possible.  However, what might work for me, may not work for you and vice versa and that is okay.  So, I share with love and with compassion for your individual journey.

This...is my journey.  A journey of hope, of trust and immense self-discovery.  Every day I remind myself that I am doing my best.  Every day I remind myself that I am learning and growing in ways that may not be tangible just yet...

With each new blog post, I am going to share something that has truly helped me to heal and with this, I hope to inspire healing for others.  The perspective of my posts are going to be of my personal account of the experiences.  If you are looking for the science behind it all, you won't find it here.  There are many other articles you can read for that.

This post may make people squeamish or turn people off yet I can honestly attribute it to saving my life.  This post is about Colon Hydrotherapy.

When I was 20, my first Naturopath advised me to try colonics to improve my health.  Back then I would ask my doctor to okay everything, not knowing that MD's were not always supportive of alternative health practices.  So, of course, my doctor said that they were dangerous and advised me against it.  When I went back to my Naturopath, she asked me: "Well, has she tried it?" and when I said no...my Naturopath said: "Then how does she *know*?".  That rationale was good enough for me, so off I went to find a Colon Hydrotherapist.

My first experience was amazing!  Of course it took me more than one treatment to truly gain the benefits and 16 years (and many treatments) later, this therapy is a must in my life.  Here are the details from my experiences:

 

Who does it: A trained Colon Therapist.  Sometimes with a nursing and other holistic therapy backgrounds.  In my experience, they are always discreet, professional, kind and have a great sense of humor.

How long does it take, what does it cost?: Approximately one hour and anywhere from $75.00 - $100.00.  In my opinion, worth every penny.

Why it helps me: From my earliest memories I remember having digestive issues.  Years of accumulated waste and toxins contributed to my ill health.  Once I realized this and paid closer attention to my bowel habits, my health changed drastically.  Colonics have helped me with this.  By seeing what comes out, I am more conscious of what is going into my body.  During times of stress or flare ups, my colon is the first thing that is affected.  Colon Hydrotherapy is how I keep on top of things.

The nitty gritty details:  Some describe it as a glorified enema.  A warm bath for your colon.  Yes.  There is an insertion of a speculum into the rectum, but it takes a second and then it is over. There is no smell.

Yes, you may choose to look and see what is coming out (my favourite part!) and yes, you *will* be amazed that all of that was inside of you.  My tummy is fairly flat and I cannot believe what continues to be cleansed out.  Bloated?  Beer Belly?  Tummy troubles?  Try it and see.  Ah...mazing.

At times, you can experience some discomfort, a bit of cramping or other sensations, but in my opinion, it is all worth it.

After your session, make sure you stay on the toilet for a bit to make sure all of the water is expelled.  You don't want to be caught driving around trying to find the nearest toilet.  Trust me.  It has been known to happen. :)

Also, please load up on your probiotics after!  Very important!

How you will feel after:  Like you are walking on air.

Where I go:  These lovely ladies take care of all of my colon needs. www.naturotherapies.com. 

If you suffer from an autoimmune condition with a history of digestive issues, colon hydrotherapy could be part of your healing process.  Personally, I feel that in this day and age, this therapy can be helpful to all people, but that is a subject for a different post.  As with everything, do your research, trust your gut and open your mind.  If you want a change for your health, this could be part of your answer.  It was for me.  And I am eternally grateful.  A. xo

Changes...

I have just recovered through 3 weeks of pneumonia and the lessons are huge. They always are.  For some reason, this struggle with my health was different.  I knew it was coming for a long time and knew that I had to make changes.  The biggest change was weaning my son.  And I resisted it every step of the way for reasons that I won't go into here too deeply.  But it all boiled down to not being enough.  Not having enough milk, not having enough tissue to produce milk and therefore feeling immense shame.  So I overcompensated.  I gave and gave and gave until I physically could not give anymore. 

You'd think I would have learned by now.  But adding a baby into the mix really shakes things up.  He is my biggest teacher, pushing me to love myself more, to put myself first, to set boundaries.  And unfortunately, it took me getting sick to really get it this time.  Next time will be better.  It always is.  After all, isn't this how we grow and learn?  Sometimes we do need to fall into the darkness so that we can transmute pain into wisdom. 

In the past three weeks, this is what I've learned. 

1.  Nursing a baby on demand through day and night and not sleeping for 2 years is not good for your health.  You might end up with pneumonia.

2.  Even though it's not good for you.  You will still be devastated when it all ends.

3.  Toddlers are fine with change.  Me, not so much.

4.  Bone broth heals all wounds.

5.  So does chocolate.

6.  Apple sauce is a great replacement for toddlers wanting milk in the middle of the night and ensures a full night of sleep.

7.  Illness and pain are amazing teachers and sometimes pharmaceutical drugs are necessary.

8.  A hospital stay really cements your life lessons into your being.

9.  You can never send yourself enough love, compassion, gentleness or kindness.  When in doubt, send yourself more.

10.  Never underestimate the power of your body to heal itself.  Miraculous things are happening in our cells every second of the day.  Connect to the magic and your body will respond.

As I sit here today, I reflect back on these last three weeks and I am grateful.  For I have healed through shame, disappointment, sadness and grief.  I am remembering that I am beautiful, lovable and worthy.  And I can say these things and actually feel them.  For the love for myself is growing, the deer medicine expanding in my heart, in my cells.  Mother Earth holding me in her sacred soil reminding me that I am goddess and light.  I will shine again.  In fact, it's starting already...A. xo